Geburtsdatum | Samstag, 24. Februar 1968 |
Geburtsort | Saint Paul |
Todesdatum | Dienstag, 29. März 2005 |
Todesort | New_Jersey |
Sternzeichen | |
Beschreibung | Mitchell Lee Hedberg (24. Februar 1968 - 29. März 2005) war ein US-amerikanischer Stand-up-Comedian, der für seinen surrealen Humor und seine trockenen Sprüche bekannt war. Seine Comedy bestand in der Regel aus kurzen, manchmal einzeiligen Witzen, gemischt mit absurden Elementen und Non-Sequiturs. Hedbergs Comedy und sein Auftreten auf der Bühne verschafften ihm eine kultige Fangemeinde, die manchmal die Pointen seiner Witze herausschrie, bevor er sie zu Ende bringen konnte. Hedberg starb im Jahr 2005 an einer versehentlichen Überdosis Drogen. |
All these jokes have been pre-approved as funny by me.
I'd like to get four people who do cart wheels very good, and make a cart.
I know a lot about cars, man. I can look at any car's headlights and tell you exactly which way it's coming.
My fake plants died because I did not pretend to water them.
I'm sick of following my dreams. I'm just going to ask them where they're goin', and hook up with them later.
I love blackjack. But I'm not addicted to gambling. I'm addicted to sitting in a semi circle.
I had a stick of CareFree gum, but it didn't work. I felt pretty good while I was blowing that bubble, but as soon as the gum lost its flavor, I was back to pondering my mortality.
Why is Cloud 9 so amazing? What is wrong with Cloud 8? That joke came off the top of my head, and the top of my head ain't funny!
Rice is great if you're really hungry and want to eat two thousand of something.
A waffle is like a pancake with a syrup trap.
I don't have a girlfriend. But I do know a woman who'd be mad at me for saying that.
This shirt is dry clean only. Which means... it's dirty.
I drank some boiling water because I wanted to whistle.
I'm a heroine addict. I need to have sex with women who have saved someone's life.
I like refried beans. That's why I wanna try fried beans, because maybe they're just as good and we're just wasting time. You don't have to fry them again after all.
I wanted to buy a candle holder, but the store didn't have one. So I got a cake.
The depressing thing about tennis is that no matter how good I get, I'll never be as good as a wall.
I recently took up ice sculpting. Last night I made an ice cube. This morning I made 12, I was prolific.
I wear a necklace, cause I wanna know when I'm upside down.
Is a hippopotamus a hippopotamus, or just a really cool Opotamus?
I was at this casino minding my own business, and this guy came up to me and said, 'You're gonna have to move, you're blocking a fire exit.' As though if there was a fire, I wasn't gonna run. If you're flammible and have legs, you are never blocking a fire exit.
